In his obsessive search for the best burgers in Leicester, reviewer Michal Okonski goes to Crafty’s Burgers, the most well-reviewed spot in the city.
An innocent social media scroll led to a thread of the best burgers in Leicester. At the top was Crafty’s. The page was strewn with positive reviews. Pfft, I thought, how good can they be?
I needed to know. I was pleased I did. They were world-class.
By day, Crafty’s is St Martin’s Coffee shop, but on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights, it transforms, Superman-like, into Crafty’s Burgers. Founded in 2015, it’s tucked into St Martin’s Square and opens from 5pm.
On a quiet Thursday night, I walked in and the smell hit me. Candles. So many candles. You could tell that this was a coffee shop first, then a burger place. It was chilled and the big windows made it feel airy and light, while the plants and hipster décor made it cosy.
But the chairs, which are way too close to each other, weren’t that comfy. No worries, I thought, maybe some beer will help. Oh dear. The selection was tragic, with only four listed. Camden Hells it was.
Now for the food. My choice was Texas Fries and a Crafty’s Poet burger, hoping that Lord Byron himself would have crafted it by hand. The fries were a mix of aioli, barbecue, lettuce, cheese and crispy onions.
Sounds good? It better be for the price. I paid £19.50 – yep, £19.50 for a burger and chips – for just the food.
But let’s start with the fries, which are an easy review: they were great. The bacon bits were perfectly salty, the cheese a good strength, and the spring onion added some needed tang. If this is what Texas tastes like, I’m booking the next flight out.
Onto the main event. I was presented with a burger that looked almost too sacred to eat – as if it wanted you to paint it like a French girl.
I picked it up but found it tricky: the structural integrity made it feel like you were just catching it instead of eating it.
But as soon as I caught the beast and took a bite, I forgave it. Lord Bryon did make this burger. He probably even wrote She Walks in Beauty* about it. It was marvellous.
I look to my girlfriend opposite, Sophia, who’s vegetarian. Pity is all I can feel. Her life choices have inhibited her from the happiness that comes with this burger. Shame.
The locally-sourced meat – which comes out rarer than other burger places – was juicy (probably what’s causing all that slippage), the sauces mixed well and there’s no question the cheese was the right consistency. Even the bacon, a difficult element of any burger to perfect – I have detailed theories on this, be warned – was not too intrusive on the star on the show, the beef.
But that was all good when the burger was intact. Which it usually wasn’t. I had to pick up the cheese and put it back in the burger multiple times. Whoever says that burgers are an aphrodisiac – don’t listen to them.
Don’t get it twisted, though. This is the best burger in Leicester. After taking my final bite, I took a fulfilled sigh and sat back. Then I sat up after being stabbed by the chair. How were you meant to appreciate a burger when you can’t sit back?
Crafty’s, overall, is worth a visit for anyone. It may demand a premium over other restaurants in the area, but burger lovers should be running to the place. Turns out social media is sometimes right.
*It’s a poem about an innocent woman he loves – the line The best of dark and bright made me think of the Poet Burger.